


Hold on to Us

by ch3rryshortcake



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-06
Updated: 2015-02-24
Packaged: 2018-02-12 03:03:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2093205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ch3rryshortcake/pseuds/ch3rryshortcake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Francis. Antonio. Lovino. Arthur. Four boys and their relationships and struggles with each other, and the world around them. They'll grow up together, but will they stay together. Framano and SpUK as the story goes on. T for now. Rating will change later.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

( tw: abuse )

"Boys! I hope you're in there sleeping, not playing!"

Nine year old, Francis and Antonio threw the blankets over themselves, giggling. They knew that it was bedtime, but there was too much too talk about.

"Si mama! Ya lo se. Estamos dormiendo. Te prometo!" Antonio called. The two boys waited for the footsteps to disappear down the hall before they pushed the blankets off their faces. They exchanged a glance in the darkness of Antonio's room, before erupting in another fit of giggles.

"I love your mama. I can't wait for when she gets better." Francis smiled, cuddling up against his best friends in the whole entire world.

"Well, mama always says that your her soon too!"

"That's because I'm here everyday. It's better than being at home." Francis mumbled. Antonio turned over onto his side, so that he could reach over for Francis.

"Is your papa still being mean to you?" Antonio asked. That's why Francis was over so much. He had told Antonio one afternoon that after his mother left him and his father, his father had started yelling a lot, saying hurtful things he had never said back when they were a happy family. Sometimes, Francis' father wouldn't let him over for day, and when he finally did, Francis looked like all the beauty had been sucked out of the world.

"Sometimes..." Francis said quietly. He looked like he wanted to cry. Antonio hated seeing Francis cry, so he tried to to change the subject.

"My cousins are finally moving here!" Antonio exclaimed, hands on Francis' slim shoulders. "They'll be here in two days."

Francis perked up. He was always interested in meeting new people, and Antonio had talked so much about his cousins, that he felt like he already knew them.

"Do you mean Lovino and Feliciano?" Francis asked, excitement leaking into his own voice.

"Mhm! The really cute ones! They're moving with Abuelo, and are going to our school. Lovino is in our grade, and he's only a few months younger than me."

Francis shut his eyes. He remembered Antonio showing him their pictures before. They really had looked cute in the photographs.

"Well when do I get to meet them?"

Antonio grinned, his bottom tooth had fallen out a few days ago, and in it's place the new one was pushing through. Despite that, Antonio still had a beautiful, infectious smile full of bright, white teeth.

"They're having dinner with us after the rest from their trip! You can come over and eat with us. And that way you can meet them then. On Sunday!"

Not having to think about it, Francis nodded. "I'll just have to ask papa."

"Okay." Antonio glanced at the clock, 10:03. They were supposed to have been sleeping thirty-three minutes ago. He wrapped an arm over Francis, closing his eyes. His favorite part about sleeping with your friend was having another soft, warm body to keep you warm. It didn't take long to fall asleep. Just Francis, Antonio, Catrine, Francis, one and only doll, and Torta, Antonio turtled stuffed animal.

*****

Sunday morning, Francis was up at seven. He hadn't slept well because his back hurt, and was covered in sore bruises. Saturday morning, his father had given permission for him to go to Antonio's for dinner. However, by three in the afternoon, he had picked up a bottle of vodka, and night of drinking changed that. At exactly ten fifty three, he stumbled, hungover into Francis' room, telling him he'd have to stay home. He was always cautious of someone discovering the bruises on Francis pale skin. He never meant to he'd lie to himself.

"But! I already told Antonio I could go!" Francis cried when his father told him the new update. "Him and his papa were going to pick me up early a-at eleven so we could play!" They'll already be here soon." Francis' hadn't meant to raise his voice, but his frustrations poured out before he could stop them.

His father was in his face fast, grabbing a fistful of Francis' long, blond hair. Francis cried out in pain, dropping the stuffed kitten that he had been playing with.

"Papa! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" He pleaded, begging to be released.

"Don't disrespect me in my house! You've already fucked up now! You told me dinner, you said nothing about them coming early." He spat.

"I'm sorry... It was Mister Carriedo's idea." Francis whined.

The older man released his grip, shoving Francis away.

"You certainly are sorry. Giving me a worse headache. You go over there, and you better be right back after dinner. You got that?"

Francis nodded quickly, his entire body shaking. He was trying his best to push back his tears.

"Now go wait outside for them. I don't want to see your face."

Francis didn't wait for him to say it again. He picked himself up, and ran out of the room. He knew his dad hated him for making his mother leave, but he wished it didn't hurt so much. His mother was gone, and it felt like his father had left with her.

As soon as he saw Francis, Antonio knew something had happened. He hugged Francis tightly, smiling as he felt Francis hug back.

There was laughter from above them, and they both looked up to see Antonio's father smile.

"Come on boys. Catch up at home, I have food on the stove." He gently urged them into his car, letting Francis forget home for a moment.

"I can't wait!" Antonio exclaimed, shutting the door to his room behind Francis. "I haven't seen them in such a long time. Antonio plopped down on his bed, gazing happily up to the ceiling.

"It smells really good. What is your papa making for dinner?" Francis asked, raking his fingers through his hair, hoping it wasn't too messed up now.

"I can't tell you." Antonio laughed. "But you'll see! Even mama got up to help, I think she's starting to get better finally." He said softly. He turned his head, spotting something at the edge of his bed. "Oh! You left Catrine here yesterday. Do you want to play?"

Francis crawled over onto the bed. "Of course I want to play." He said, picking up Catrine. "But I don't feel like playing dolls and action figures right now. Let's pretend we're in a magical kingdom! I'll be the queen of course, and you can be my loyal knight."


	2. Chapter 2

Lovino glared up at the house where his cousin lived, trying with all his might to ignore his grandfather's, Julius, talking. The house that Antonio and his family lived was neither small nor big in Lovino's opinion. It was average sized for the area, with a shade tree out front, and pretty yellow and pink flowers.

"Now I know you boys are tired, but we're here to see family. You can never be too tired to visit family. And they've all missed you both. After dinner, we'll go home and get some sleep."

Lovino rolled his eyes, nervousness biting at him. He didn't want to move here in the first place. He didn't have a lot of friends back home, but he had a couple. And now he had to start all over, starting with spending time with family he hadn't seen in forever just after hours of traveling. He glanced over at Feliciano who seemed excited on the other hand, basically bouncing on his toes. At least he was happy to be there.

After watching Julius knock, the door swung wide open and a warm body collided with his. A pair of arms wrapped tightly around, squeezing the air right out of him!

"Lovino! I missed you so much!"

Lovino squeezed his eyes shut.

"Antonio…. I missed you too." He mumbled, a lot more sincere than he had expected to feel.

Antonio peeled away to hug Julius and Feliciano, happy squeals and loud laughs filling Lovino's ears.

Sighing, Lovino looked away and into the house, spotting someone watching them in the hallway. It looked like a pretty little girl about his age, with their long, soft-looking hair. Lovino blinked, and that quick Antonio was back at his side again, linking their hands.

"I want you to meet my friend!" Antonio smiled.

Lovino glanced back to the hallway, the girl was gone. However, he figured that if Antonio's friend was the girl with the pretty hair, he wasn't going to complain.

Antonio's father, who had set down his oven mitts long enough to greet the family interjected into Antonio's plans.

"Actually Antonio, if you'd go take Feliciano and Lovino up to your room with Francis, we'll call you guys down when dinner is finished. It won't be ready for another thirty minutes."

"Okay papa!" Antonio chirped, taking Feliciano's hand as well. He led them down the hallway to his room, talking non-stop. He stopped at his door, and lightly kicked it open, pushing the other boys inside.

Francis was back to sitting on the bed, looking up at the three with a smile. He made eye contact with Lovino, who turned his head away, blushing.

_Cute._

The thought came up in both Lovino's and Francis' heads.

"Hi." Francis smiled, pushing himself up to his feet. He walked over, extending his hands as if he was a businessman and not a nine year old boy.

"I'm Francis."

Lovino stared at his hand, and glanced back up. He was studying Francis, trying to figure him out. He still couldn't tell rather he was a girl or not. He suddenly remembered Francis' hand, and flushed taking it to shake.

"Lovino…" He mumbled.

"And I'm Feliciano!" Feliciano jumped in, giving Francis a great big hug. "Let's be friends! You're pretty!"

Lovino pulled Feliciano back, embarrassed by his brother's behavior.

"I'm sorry. Mama dropped him." He said, pushing him off to the side.

Antonio and Francis giggled, which only fueled Lovino's embarrasment.

"Now you all know each other!" Antonio chirped. "Francis is my best friend. You'll really like him."

The world crushed down on Lovino at the word, 'him'. Why would god waste such a pretty face on a boy?

Antonio seemed to catch exactly what was playing through Lovino's mind. He laughed, gently nudging Francis' side.

"I think Lovino thought you were a girl." Antonio sang.

"I did not!" Lovino fumed, his face flushed.

Francis lightly shrugged his shoulders. This wasn't the only time someone had confused him for being a girl, and he really didn't mind. He had long hair, bright blue eyes, and delicate features under pale skin. His voice was still soft and high from childhood, and one out of five people would get it wrong. Francis gave Lovino a smile.

"As long as he thinks I'm pretty. Maybe he'll want to be be my king."

Lovino looked over at Antonio confused, and slightly disgusted.

"What the heck is he talking about?"

"Oh! Oh! I want to be the prince!" Feliciano asked, taking Francis hands. "And Lovi, nonno said that heck is a 'nonno' word."

Antonio giggled once again, taking a seat on the floor. He had the rest of them sit down, arranging them in a circle. They all sat criss-cross applesauce besides for Francis; who sat on his legs, like royal highnesses do.

"We're playing a game called Magic Kingdom! I'm the knight, and I have a magical sword and horse! Francis is the queen, so you can marry Francis and be the king!" Antonio explained animatedly.

"No way am I marrying him! He's a boy!" Lovino said standing up, shaking his head.

Antonio tilted his head, not understanding the problem. "So, it's just pretend. Boys can marry boys."

"W-Well not this boy!" Lovino declared, stomping off. He rushed out of the room, and slammed the door shut behind him. "Especially not if I have to marry Francis." He mumbled to himself.

He walked into the kitchen, looking for his grandpa. He spotted Julius chatting with Antonio's father and mother, who looked particularly frail. She had the same big, pretty smile that Antonio did, but she looked tired. Her hair looked like it was hidden beneath her sun hat.

She must have felt Lovino watching her because she turned around, directing her smile towards Lovino. He flushed, he hadn't meant to get caught staring. The two older men turned to see where she was looking, spotting Lovino awkwardly standing there.

"Oh Lovino!" Julius boomed, "Just the young man I needed."

Lovino perked up. His grandpa had been thinking about him? That was rare. He walked over, looking up at him a small but growing, hopeful smile.

"Si, nonno?"

"Could you go get your brother for me? Carriedo here doesn't believe that your little brother had been learning spanish!"

Lovino stopped walking, the smile gone. Of course. It was really about Feliciano. He sighed softly, and turned around. "Yes sir, I'll be right back." He tried to pretend that he didn't hear his nonno mention how smart Feliciano was, just like his grandpa.

"Is he okay?" Francis asked Antonio after Lovino had walked out of the room.

Antonio stared at the door for a moment, slowly rising to his feet.

"I'll go check."

"No." Feliciano said, grabbing the edge of Antonio's shorts. "He's okay. I think he's just tired from the trip. He'd rather be left alone."

Antonio hesitated, before sitting back down.

"If you say so."

"He really is cute though" Francis sighed. "You were right." Maybe Lovino didn't want to 'marry' a boy, but Francis would have been very happy to have Lovino be his king. He was really cute with his light tan, and freckles peppered all over his nose. He'd kiss everyone if he could!

The boys continued playing without Lovino. After a few minutes however, loving walked back through the door.

Francis smiled over at him, but Lovino wouldn't look up at any of them.

"Feli, nonno called for you."

Feliciano got up, and skipped out of the room. Lovino once again, had to force himself not to roll his eyes up to the ceiling, following Feliciano back down the hall.

Antonio scooted next to Francis, and rested his head on his shoulder. He didn't noticed Francis wince, certain part of his body still sore.

"I know Lovino is a little grumpy, but what did you think?"

"I don't know...' Francis said. "I liked them."

Dinner was a lot better. Even Lovino seemed to perk up with all the different Spanish and Italian flavors set out on the table.

Even after finding out that Francis was a boy, Lovino couldn't stop sneaking glances at Francis. He was just so pretty, it was irritating! It was the same for Francis though, those freckles were so cute.

After dinner, Antonio asked Francis if he wanted to stay and play. He almost agreed until he remembered what his father had said.

"I have to go him." Francis said, tugging at a strand of his hair. It was a nervous habit he had more recently developed.

Antonio pouted, wrapping his arms around Lovino's and Feliciano's neck.

"Aw well, I'll have papa dive you home." He let go off his cousins to go run off and get his dad.

Lovino and Francis stood there awkwardly while Feliciano chirped up and started talking about all the friends he was going to make at his new school. The awkward feeling was a little too much, even for Francis who usually always had something to say. He quickly thought of a way out, remembering that Catrine was still up in Antonio's room.

"I have to get something out of Antonio's" He said turning quickly. "Tell Antonio I'll be right back." Francis didn't look back at either boys or bother to see if they had heard. He simply skipped off, humming a song to his favorite Disney movie under his breath.

Lovino was secretly grateful that Francis had left. Being in the room with him was making anxious.

"I like him." Feliciano smiled up at his big brother.

"Oh shut up. You like everyone, stupid."

"Hey! Don't call me stupid! That's not nice!"

"I can call you whatever I want."

"Well you're stupid! Nonno says I'm smart. Just like him. He never says you."

Lovino would have attacked his brother right then if it hadn't been for Antonio walking back in with Julius trailing closely behind him.

"Where's Francis?" Antonio asked upon noticing that the other boy was no longer in the room. "Abuelo offered to take him home since you guys have to leave anyways."

Lovino's eyes widened, looking up to Julius. "Wait! What?" He definitely did not like that idea.

Julius ignored Lovino's response as Feliciano ran into his arms.

"Francis went to Antonio's room to get something!" Feliciano said.

"Oh! I'll go get him then!" Antonio offered, racing down the hall.

The ride to Francis house could have been described as surprisingly pleasant by almost anyone if they had happened to peek into the top of the ceiling, snopping on all that was said. Francis was sitting to the right of Feliciano who sat in the middle, while Lovino sat in the front, so it ended up that Francis also sat behind Julius. He politely answered every question with a charming little smile. He liked Julius immediately, and he could tell that Julius liked him.

"Now, I just have on favor to ask of you, Francis."

Francis nodded, he looked up to the front, gaze landing in the rearview mirror. Lovino had been watching him through it. They both blushed when their eyes met, but instead of just looking away, Lovino rolled his eyes and diverted his attention to things going by in the window.

Francis frowned, averting his gaze to his feet.

"Of course!" He said, still managing to keep enthusiasm despite the look on his face.

"Lovino and Feliciano start school tomorrow, and I need someone I can trust to keep an eye on them and show them the ropes. Can I depend on you for that?"

Francis glanced up, again meeting Lovino's gaze which had hardened. Lovino shook his head, warning Francis to leave it alone.

But now Lovino had presented himself as a challenge, and even as a child, Francis couldn't say no.

"I'd be glad to Mister Julius!" He smiled, pushing his hair behind his ears.

"Great! You van rise with us to school then, we're going to take Antonio too."

Lovino groaned loud enough for Francis to hear, but Francis continued to force himself to smile. He was sure he had just made an enemy of the cute, freckled boy. But that was fine, he was determined for them to be friends by the end of the school year.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for reading! If anyone knows what the fandom uses as a name for Grandpa Rome, let me know. And does anyone know who Catrine is? I hope I'm not the only who likes Monster High dolls.
> 
> We meet Arthur in the next chapter!


	3. Chapter 3

"Arthur! Arthur! Mum says you better wake up or you won't have time to eat breakfast."

One. Two. Three. Crash! Something got knocked over in the room, jolting Arthur awake more than the sound of his seven year old brother's, Liam, voice.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I fix it!" His youngest brother, Peter, promised in his tiny voice.

Arthur groaned, grabbing his pillow and pulled it over his face. "Both of you. Get out. Please! Peter, whatever it is, I'll fix myself."

Liam giggled, sticking out his tongue before running off.

"O-Okay Artsur." Peter mispronounced as he always did, following after Liam, laughing.

This was Arthur's life. He shared a room with his two youngest brothers, Liam, and Peter who was three. He had two older brothers who shared their own room together. The oldest was Owen. He was the tamest of the group, and turned seventeen over the summer. The next oldest was Allistair. His middle name was Scott, like Scott Summers from the X-men, a rather annoying boy in Arthur's class had informed him once before. They sometimes called him Scott instead, like Scotland, the place Arthur's family had lived for two years when Allistair was born. So technically, while his parents were English, Allistair was a Scot. Personally, Arthur thought they should have left him there.

Again, this was Arthur's life. He lived in a three bedroom and unfortunately, one and half bath house with his five brother's and his parents. The worst part was that he was middle child, so he had never, and would never get a break.

Arthur sat up slowly in his bed. At least he had his own bed. His younger brothers had bunk beds, instead. He rubbed at his eyes, rubbing the sleep from them. He glanced over at his clock, 6:43. He was late. Maybe if he hadn't stayed up all night reading, he wouldn't be so tired. But he was reading Harry Potter for the seventh time, and he couldn't put them down.

He looked around the room, trying to survey the damage left behind by Peter the Terrible. It looked like his model plane was gone now thanks to minor evil, but he wasn't too worried about it. His fascination with planes ended a little while ago, and was replaced with things of the forest, and magic.

He picked up the pieces of his model plane, and got ready for another day of not talking to anyone at school. He showered, got dressed, and did all the little things in a boy's morning routine.

Once he was done, he rushed to the kitchen with his backpack over his shoulder. He sat down at a plate of toast, eggs, and apple slices, eating as quickly as he could before he and Liam had to be dropped off at school. He had seven minutes.

He was nibbling on an apple slice when Allistair walked in, not even dressed, and his red hair messy from a night of sleep. Arthur rolled his eyes, wondering how he ended up being more responsible than his older brother. Arthur was only nine, Allistair was thirteen already. If Allistair didn't hurry, Owen would leave him to to his middle school by himself.

His mother Alice had the same idea, rushing around the kitchen. She was helping her husband, Harry, finish the boy's lunches.

"Allistair Scott Kirkland, do we need to buy you a new alarm clock for you to get up on time for once?"

Arthur snorted, "Don't bother mum, I'm sure something will mysteriously happen to this one too."

Allistair looked over at Arthur, his eyes narrowing into slits. "Yea, maybe one of your faerie freaks will take off with it this time."

"Boys."

Arthur huffed, finishing his slice as if the comment hadn't bother him. Once he was finished, his father drove him and Liam to school.

Arthur dropped Liam off early at his class so that he could go straight to his own early, just like he did everyday. When he got to class, he realized much to his horror, that everything had been re-arranged, namely the desks. At the beginning of the year, they had been arranged in single rows, each desk to themselves. But now, while still in rows, each desk sat in a pair. He couldn't sit alone at the back of the class anymore.

Nevertheless, he still went for one of the back pairs in the corner. That is, until his teacher, Miss Larsen walked over to him.

She smiled, the corner of her eyes crinkling just a little.

"Oh no, Arthur We have assigned seating now." She said, laying a light hand on Arthur's shoulder. "I wanted to try something different. You'll be sitting over there." She pointed, and walked over to the desk, tapping where each student name was taped into the corner.

He hadn't seem that, but suddenly sweet Miss Larsen with her pretty laugh and perfect dark skin had become sour and terribly flawed. She had placed Arthur right in the middle of the second row.

He stalked over, dread filling every inch of his body. He hoped he wasn't sitting by Alfred! Or worse, that albino German kid who tried to dare him to scream penis during the pledge at the last assembly. He set this things down on top his new desk, and then glanced over at the name on the one next to his.

_Antonio Fernandez Carriedo Jr._

Arthur wasn't sure if this was better or worse.

Lovino wanted to throw up as soon as he saw Francis walk out of the house with his stupid little ponytails held by stupid little bows. What he didn't noticed was Francis little limp, or see the tired expression on Francis face. He didn't get a chance to either because as soon as Francis got in the car, he was all smiles.

"Hola Francis!" Antonio said cheerfully, leaning over Feliciano to give Francis a hug. "Wow! I like your hair."

"Thanks." Francis smiled, "I did it all by myself."

"And you did a very good job." Julius grinned, looking back at them.

Lovino snorted, he wasn't impressed.

"Who's ready to go to school?"

"Me! Oh! Oh me!" Feliciano said excitably.

Francis giggled, shutting his door. He looked up at the rearview mirror, seeing as he was stuck behind Lovino this time, and smiled.

"Hi Lovino. Your hair looks nice today too."

Lovino flushed, looking away unsure if Francis was being sincere or poking fun at him. It probably wouldn't have helped much to know Francis was speaking honestly. It would have just embarrassed him more.

At school, Julius went in with all four boys, having paperwork to finish. As he finished up, and school was about to start, he gave his boys each a kiss to their soft, ruddy cheeks, telling them to have a good day at school. Then he sent them off in the hands of Francis and Antonio. Antonio offered to walk Feliciano to his class, and would see Lovino and Francis back in the class they shared.

Lovino waited for Antonio to walk away before he turned to Francis, arms crossed.

"I don't need your help. I can find the class on my own." He said, sticking his bottom lip out.

Francis stared at him, this time he was the one who wanted to roll his eyes.

"But we have the same class. We could just walk together."

Lovino turned away from Francis, his nose high up in the air.

"I don't care. I don't want to walk with you or your stupid ponytails! You look like a girl! But you're not! And it's stupid." He huffed.

"Fine! I didn't want to walk with you anyways." Francis said, stomping away down the hall.

Lovino immediately felt bad, glancing over his shoulder. He hadn't meant to say _all_ of that. Francis made him nervous which also made him mad. Plus he never really could say anything right. But he couldn't go and follow Francis now, even though the room numbers were really confusing.

Francis told himself over and over that he didn't care what Lovino did. He was stupid! And he had called Francis stupid. He walked into his classroom, a little confused at the new layout. He greeted Miss Larsen, and politely asked where he sat. She walked him over to the second row, and sat him in the back, third pair of desks down. He glanced over at the desk next to his, and saw that there wasn't a name yet. He hoped Antonio didn't sit too far.

After a few minutes, Antonio walked in.

Francis stood up and waved, smiling as he watched Miss Larsen sit Antonio down in the pair of desks in front of his. He looked over at who Antonio was sitting next to, a boy with short, messy, blond hair. Kirkland? He had heard the name before, and not in class.

Antonio looked around the classroom, wondering why Francis was here but he didn't see Lovino. he turned around in his seat to get Francis' attention.

"Hey Francis. Where's Lovino?"

Francis shrugged, a pout crossing over his lips. "He said he'd find class by himself."

"Ay..." Antonio sighed, sitting back around. He looked over to his new neighbor. He didn't remember ever talking to him. "Hi." He said, trying to be friendly. Arthur didn't respond, too engrossed in his book to pay Antonio any mind. But Antonio wash not one to try once and give up. He leaned over Arthur's desk, tapping his shoulder gently.

"Hi!" He repeated, just as enthusiastically as the last time.

Arthur practically jumped out of his seat, recoiling away from Antonio as far back as the desk would allow.

"W-What are you doing?"

"I just wanted to say hi since we're sitting next to each other now! My name is Antonio. I don't think I know yours." Antonio was genuinely interested in Arthur. While he had never talked to him before, he had noticed that Arthur always sat to the side, even at recess and lunch."

Arthur stared at Antonio, his thick brows knitting together in an even thicker line. Didn't the fact that Arthur had his entire face buried in the book not show that he didn't want to talk to anyone? He stayed to himself at home, why would he want to be any different here?

Even with Arthur not responding, Antonio held his gaze, his green eyes filled with a warmth that matched his smile. It put Arthur off guard, and he felt his own face begin to warm.

He looked down at the desk before he completely dissolved under Antonio's gaze.

"I'm Arthur, okay? It's on the stupid dest if you can read."

"Of course I can read, silly."

"Congrats."

"You're funny." Antonio smiled. Arthur glanced back over at him, the tip of his ears feeling like they were on fire. "I like you."

Before Arthur could respond to that, the school bell rang, and Miss Larsen started talking.

Lovino still hadn't made it to class, and Francis was starting to feel even worse for leaving him.

Class had been going on for five minutes before Lovino finally came through the door with one of the ladies from the front office.

"Miss Larsen, you have a new student today. He had some difficulty finding your class, but I think he's all ready to learn now. Aren't you Mister Vargas?"

Lovino nodded, avoiding looking at the people in the room who would be his new classmates. He was so nervous. He wanted to hide knowing everyone was staring at him.

Miss Larsen walked over, running her hands briskly through her coarse, curly hair.

"Thank you Mrs. Daniels! And welcome to our class! Would you like to introduce yourself?"

Lovino wanted to say no, and just be directed to his seat as soon as possible, but he knew he really didn't have a choice.

"I'm Lovino Vargas." He stuttered, his face turning bright red.

"Welcome again to the school, Lovino." She smiled warmly. "There's an empty seat right next to Mister Bonnefoy in the back if you want to go take it. Everyone say hello to Lovino."

Lovino deflated seeing the only open spot by Francis. He hated this class already. He counted every miserable tile up util his new desk, and plopped down into the seat. He tried to sink in as much as he could. Thankfully, Francis said nothing to him. Not even 'hello' with the rest of the class.

"Since we have a new student, and I've made some adjustments to the seating arrangements, I want everyone to turn to the person next to them, and tell that person three things about yourself. Ready? Set. Go!"

Antonio started right away, eager to tell Arthur everything. Arthur surprised himself by listening, though he didn't really want to have to talk himself.

Francis tried talking to Lovino, but Lovino placed his head on the desk, and wished for Francis to stop talking. Eventually, Francis did, opening up his binder to an empty page, and doodled instead. He drew little cats, filling the page with whiskers and tiny kitty ears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for still reading! I hope my writing is coming out how I've been envisioning it in my head.


	4. Chapter 4

At the end of the school day, Julius picked the boys up, and took them each to their homes. Francis was the first to be dropped off, and then Antonio was of course next. He said bye, pulled his green backpack over his shoulder, and got out of the car.

He waved once he opened the door to his house, yelling a few more goodbyes.

The first thing Antonio did was kick his shoes off at the door, and then run into his parents room. His mother, Isabel, looked up at him from the bed, smiling. Antonio always thought he had the prettiest mama, with her perfect tanned skin, and deep green eyes that matched his. Even when she started loosing her hair from the medicine she told Antonio she had to take to get better, he still thought she was perfect.

"Hola mama!" Antonio jumped into bed with her, wrapping his arms around her thin body. "You look so pretty today!" He smiled, kissing her.

She laughed, touching the top of her head. She was wearing a hand scarf that was stylishly tied up in a bow at the side.

"Gracias bambino. How was school?"

Antonio flopped down beside her, his body cuddled up close against hers.

"It was good. I think I made a new friend. His name was Arthur. I like him. He didn't talk a lot though."

Isabel nuzzled him, running her bony fingers through his dark, wavy hair. "That's good ninito. Are you hungry? I can go make you a snack." Antonio gasped, jumping up from the bed.

"No! No! I'll go make us a snack. I have to go feed Estrella anyways. So you stay right here." He scrambled down to the floor, making sure to tuck her back into the blankets. "You stay here, mama."

Smiling fondly at her baby boy, Isabel reached out taking his hand. "Stealing my job aren't you? I'm supposed to take care of you."

Antonio squeezed her hand gently. "It's only for a little while." He said. "Until you get better, remember?"

Isabel fought off the sadness from spreading to her features, squeezing his hand in return.

"Only for a little while." She sighed softly, pressing a kiss to his small hand. "Gracias amor."

Antonio nodded, and then ran off to feed his pet turtle, Estrella. He named her that from the weird, star shaped pattern on her shell. After that, he went to the kitchen and made himself and his mother a snack. He wished she'd get better soon. For now though, he didn't mind helping out.

Back at him, Lovino immediately walked into his room and took a nap. The day had worn him out. When he woke back up a little less than a couple of hours later, he went downstairs to get a snack before he'd have to start his homework. He thought it was rather cruel for the teacher to give it to him on his first day here.

He walked by the living room, and noticed that the tv was on. It was a cartoon, one of Feliciano's favorites. That only meant that he was in there watching it. More than likely he was sitting in their nonno's lap, because he was Julius favorite. No. He was everyone's favorite. Everyone's favorite besides for their mother, but she was gone now along with their father thanks to Feliciano.

In class the next day, Lovino could tell that something was off with Francis. It was obvious since they picked him up from his house. He came up with his hair down, and a light sweater worn over his arms, which was already odd with it being as hot as it was that week.

Francis also was very quiet that morning. By the time class had started, Francis had said a total of two or three things that entire morning. But what sealed the deal was when Lovino kept seeing Antonio turn away from what he was going on about with Arthur to glance back worriedly at Francis.

Of course, Lovino thought it was his fault. He had been so mean the day before. As much as he didn't to, he felt like he had to do something. Lovino glanced up to make sure the teacher wasn't looking his way. Clear. He reached over across Francis desk, and grabbed the notebook that Francis had been doodling in once again instead of listening to Miss. Larsen. Francis sat up straighter in surprise, watching Lovino with careful eyes instead of snatching the notebook right back.

Lovino looked over the page, an amused and slightly annoyed look gracing his young Roman features. More cats, but this time with glasses on them. Lovino tried really hard not to smile, but easily rolled his eyes. He liked cats too. He quickly scribbled something down, and pushed the notebook back onto Francis' desk.

Francis leaned over the notebook, reading the messy handwriting.

_Are you okay?_

Francis felt his heart thump a little faster.

Lovino watched as Francis' cheeks turned a light shade of pink. He fidgeted, tugging the sleeves of his sweater down over his hands before he wrote something back.

_I'm okay. :)_

Lovino frowned; he didn't look okay. He drew little mustaches on all the cats to match their glasses before giving the notebook back.

Francis smiled.

Recess seemed to come quicker that day, and started off like any other day. Arthur sat alone on the swings, watching the other kids play with each other, until Lovino walked over and sat on the swing next to him.

"Hey..." Lovino mumbled. He wasn't exactly good at meeting new people, and he really didn't want to talk in the first place. He just came to swing since he didn't have anything else to do.

"Hi."

They were the same. They didn't say anything else, simply sitting there, swinging side by side.

Lovino soon noticed Antonio walk out of the building with a soccer ball in his hands. He lifted it up, and a group of kids cheered running over to him. They all ran over to the field, even Francis, who slowly trailed behind the crowd.

Lovino never did actually apologize, and it was nagging at him enough for him to get out of the swing, and walk over to Francis. It irritated that he felt like this. He didn't like feeling bad for the things he did, much less have to apologize for them.

"Hey stupid!' He called, reaching out and grabbed Francis arm. The other boy visibly flinched, as if Lovino's touch had been fire on his skin, relaxing only when he saw it was Lovino.

"What?"

Lovino looked down at his shoes. Julius had bought them right before they moved, so they were still brand new, without a single scruff.

"I...I'm sorry." He mumbled, rubbing at his arm shyly. His chubby cheeks reddened brightly. This was even harder than he had thought. "You were being a jerkface, but... I kind of was too. So yeah. Sorry." He looked up at Francis slowly, nervous that he was going to yell at him or something. But he didn't.

Instead, Francis took Lovino's hand and smiled.

"Do you want to football with us?"

"It's called soccer!" Another young blond boy yelled, coming up behind him. This was Alfred.

Francis sighed, placing his hands on his hips. "Only Americans call it soccer. Americans that speak English at that, stupid."

"Yeah? You're American, and you live in America! Plus, you're speaking English right now!"

"But my parents are French."

Alfred laughed, "Still!"

Lovino snorted, trying not to laugh. "Well soccer sounds stupid."

"Oh my god, can you guys shut up and come play!" Gilbert groaned, pulling at his light hair.

Francis rolled his eyes.

Lovino smiled, watching as Francis tied his hair up. When he lifted his arms, the sweater rolled up and Lovino could clearly see bruises all down Francis' arms.

"Hey, what happened to your arms?"

Francis shoved his sleeves back down, startled. His face paled.

"Nothing."

The game was fun. There was two teams. Gilbert's who had Francis, Antonio, a red-head girl, and girl with her hair tied in a ponytail named, Elizabetha. Lovino ended up joining their side. The other team was Alfred's. He had Matthew, Michelle, Bella, a boy with a faux hawk, and a tall, skinny boy with hair tightly braided to his scalp.

By the time the whistle blew, signaling that it was time to go in, they were all tired and panting. Gilbert's team won, 3-2. It had been close. Antonio made the last goal, and for the rest of the time, it was game of keep away, and close misses.

Lovino especially felt good about the game. He even scored once. For the next few weeks, Francis invited him to play. He said yes every time.

A month after Miss Larsen had changed seats and disturbed the balance, she came to the class with another announcement.

"So class, our next project is going to be very exciting. We'll be starting it today, but the best part is, you'll be working with partners." All at once, the classroom exploded into gasps, everyone asking their best friend if they wanted to partner with them

Francis grabbed Antonio's shoulder and shook it gently.

"We're going to be partners, right?"

Antonio looked back, and grinned. "If you want to, Francis!"

Arthur was one of the few who groaned out loud. He hated doing things with partners. No one ever wanted to partner with him, and when they did, he had to do everything.

"Here's the catch though." Miss Larsen said, quieting down the class. "To further encourage a good relationship with your deskmate, you'll be working very closely with the person beside you."

The rest of the class groaned this time.

Everyone besides for Antonio. He looked over to Arthur, big smile on his face. He had wanted to be Francis partner, but this would give him a chance to become better friends with Arthur.

"Isn't that great, Arthur?" Antonio said, grabbing Arthur's hand. "We're going to be partners! Maybe you'll even come over my house and work on it with me. I can show you my room, and my turtle..."

Arthur sighed loudly. It sounded anything but great.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will try to post a new chapter one or twice a week. Next week, I'll be going back through and fixing all the little typos I've noticed throughout the chapters. Don't you dare go back and try to find them!  
> By the way, for those who don't know, Julius is Grandpa Rome.  
> I really appreciate comments! I've gotten some on FF.net and it feels really good to hear back from you guys. Thanks for reading!


	5. Chapter 5

As the school bell rang for everyone to go home the next day, Antonio pushed his chair in, and followed after Arthur.

"Hey Arthur! I forgot to tell you earlier! I asked my parents, and they said I could go over your house today, and work on our project together."

Arthur stopped short, his fingers tightening around the strap of his backpack.

"My... my mom doesn't want any company over today. Can we go to your house?" The last thing Arthur wanted was for Antonio to enter into the insanity of his house.

Antonio blinked, of course he didn't mind.

"Sure! Francis, papa, and I made cookies last night. There's still some left so we can have cookies and milk as a snack first."

Arthur nodded, holding his books with other hand, and holding them even closer to his chest. He was nervous, and it was Antonio that was making him feel that way. He hated it.

"I usually get a ride with Lovino. He's my cousin. I don't know if I told you that or not. I'll ask him if you can just come with us." Antonio said, wrapping his arm around Antonio's shoulders. "Come on!"

Francis, Lovino, and Feliciano were already waiting in the car with Julius once Antonio and Arthur reached it. Julius said that he didn't mind Arthur tagging along, just as long one of them shared a seatbelt. Francis and Antonio ended up being the designated seatbelt sharers.

As he dropped the boys off, he told them that the next day he wanted them all to come over to his home to work on their project. And since it would be Friday, after working on the project the could hang out around the pool and eat pizza. It was agreed.

"Mama is probably resting. So you can meet her at dinner. Even after she got sick, she always tries to make sure we eat dinner as a 'familia.'" Antonio chirped as they walked into the home. He took Arthur's hand, and walking to the long hallway that led to his room.

Arthur turned watermelon pink, glancing down at their hands, almost offended at the touch, if not just confused.

"Dinner?" He stuttered.

"You're going to eat dinner with us, right?" Antonio asked, glancing over at Arthur, raising his eyebrows.

Arthur had never been invited to eat at anyone's house besides for Uncles and Aunts. It just made that nervous ball in his stomach tightened even more so.

"I-I don't know..." Arthur mumbled. He noticed a picture in the hallway with Antonio and what he guessed to be his parents. His mother looked really pretty. Arthur wondered if she was as nice as Antonio was...and as obnoxious.

Antonio stopped, tugging his backpack back over his shoulder as it slide to slide down.

"Please?" He asked softly. Arthur tried not to look into Antonio's eyes. He could tell they were just like his mother's in the picture. He knew exactly what would happen if failed to not to look. The same thing that always happened. Antonio had the best puppy dog face that Arthur had ever witnessed. Even better than his little brother's, Peter! His lips would pull out into a little pout, and his tan cheeks would turn a soft rosy shade of red. And that's all it would take. Arthur would give him his last pencil, or help him with the problem on the homework.

Arthur glanced into them for just a second, and it worked just like magic. Arthur let out a loud sigh between his thin, chapped lips, glaring at the ground as if it was it's fault.

"Fine..."

Antonio's lips curled right back up into a big, wide grin, fast enough to rival a bolt of lightning.

"Ah! Bien!" He said, opening the door to his room.

"I'll show you my room, and then I'll get the cookies." He pushed Arthur in, and immediately took of his backpack and kicked of his shoes.

"I'll be right back, okay? You can take off your shoes too, and sit on the bed."

Antonio skipped out of the room, as happy as he always seemed to be to Arthur.

Arthur looked around Antonio's room. It was a pale blue color, with wooden floors and a big octopus rug in the center of the floor. In the center of the wall parallel to Antonio's bed was a large window, and underneath it was a small aquarium. That caught Arthur's attention. He walked over quickly and pressed his face to the cool glass. On the other side, a turtle slowly lifted it's head out of it's shell, as if to say 'hello'. Arthur smiled, his fingers slightly curling over the glass.

Antonio first went down to his mother's room, kissing her warm cheek as she slept. Next, he walked into the kitchen and poured both him and Arthur a cold glass of milk. The only clean cups were the glass ones that his father didn't like him using without asking, but he didn't want to wash two cups, so he used them anyways. He then grabbed the plate of cookies, and juggled everything in his small, nine year old hands.

"I'm back!" Antonio cheerfully chirped, managing to barely get the milk and cookies to his dresser.

Arthur jumped a little, wiping his hands on his pants. He slide his backpack off, and walked over to the edge of the bed and sat down.

"What's your turtle's name?"

Handing Arthur a glass and a couple of cookies, Antonio sat down to Arthur's side.

"Her name is Estrella." Antonio smiled. "It means star in Spanish."

Arthur took a big bite of the cookie. It was good. He bet it would have tasted even better if it just came out of the over. He sipped some milk, helping the chocolate melt in his mouth. It was really good.

"So we have to research about each other's cultures. Your family is from Spain, right?"

"Yes, and you're from England? You sound like it." Antonio giggled. "I think your accent is cute, just like you."

With his face reddening, Arthur took another big bite of his cookie.

"I don't think that's what this project is about." Arthur grumbled.

"I guess not." Antonio mumbled in response.

Arthur looked over at Antonio, even his ears burned.

"So do you want me to start by asking questions or you?"

Antonio shrugged, setting down his glass of milk so he could lay down across his bed.

"You go first, Arthur. And then you can tell me everything about you."

This was the first time Francis had been in Lovino's room, and it was the first time Lovino had someone in it that wasn't part of his family.

"We better get started. You said you can only be here for an hour today, right?" Lovino asked, taking out the laptop his grandpa had bought him a few months ago. Francis nodded slowly, a little bewildered.

"You have your own computer?"

"Yeah, so?"

Francis shook his head. He didn't want to say anything.

They sat next to each other on the floor, close enough so that their arms just barely grazed each other's as Lovino powered on the electronic.

Francis had remembered Antonio mentioning that Julius had money, but he hadn't realized just how much until he stepped through the front door of their home. The inside of the house looked like the inside of a smaller scale museum with magnificent paintings littering the walls, and extravagant lighting...lighting the way.

"The French are pretty stupid, it seems."

Francis stopped thinking about the pretty lights long enough to realize what Lovino said, and to be highly offended.

"Hey!"

The corner of Lovino's lips curled up into a grin, but he tried his best to keep his face neutral.

Francis looked at the screen, skimming over the article Lovino had been reading.

"Well I'm sure the Italians did even more stupid things!"

"Are you calling me stupid? In my own house?" Lovino questioned.

"You called us stupid first! This isn't what we're even supposed to be researching." Francis huffed, turning the laptop towards himself. He typed something and then grinned as he turned it back to Lovino.

"There."

Lovino read the question in the search bar.

_'Why are the French so much better than the Italians?'_

"Hey!" Lovino shouted, he playfully shoved Francis, and they fell over giggling and fighting over control of the computer.

About an hour later, Francis was taken back home to his not surprisingly, empty house. Even though his dad had told him to be home at a certain time, he wasn't home himself. He'd had probably come home and then took off to go drinking with his friends. Francis had found at a couple of weeks back that one of those friends were Arthur's dad, Harry Kirkland. He had yet to meet him.

Francis did his other homework, made himself dinner, ate, took a shower, brushed his hair with fifty strokes of his brush, and then crawled under his blankets in his cold room. It wasn't completely lonely, he had Catrine and his favorite stuffed cat. Maybe someday his papa would let him adopt a cat.

The house was quiet without his father there, but even so, cuddled with his friends, Francis managed to sleep.

Someone was in his room. Francis woke up to the sound of this door creaking, and the wooden panels on the floor moaning softly under a familiar weight. Francis didn't dare move. Once the figure stopped at his bed, the smell of alcohol filled his nose, and he knew it was his father.

The coils of his bed whined as his father sunk into the bed next to him.

"Marianne..." Jean crowed, pressing his his warm body against Francis. That was his father's name. Francis shivered as he felt large, rough hands run up his soft, thing legs. The stubble of his father's chin tickled at his neck.

"Oh Marianne... I miss you so much."

Francis felt a mixture of nausea seep into his stomach. He was afraid and very confused. The stinky smell of alcohol on his papa's warm breath burned his nose. He just wanted him to stop. But he was afraid to say anything.

"Why did you betray me? Why did you leave me, Marianne. I love you." Jean whispered, his voice raspy like a broken record.

Francis throat tightened. His papa sounded so sad.

"Papa..." He whispered, his small hands wrapping around the older man's neck. He was shaking. "It's me...Francis. Maman isn't here, but I love you papa."

Francis waited.

He waited for Jean to do something, say something back, and acknowledge him. As much as it scared him, he didn't want his father to leave his bed, he just didn't want him to do things he knew he only did with his mother. He wanted him to hold him and tell him that he loved him, but not with his hands on his warm thighs and not with that voice.

He waited a little longer, feeling his father's weight shift. It felt heavier now. Then he heard the soft snoring that rumbled in his throat, and Francis realized he had fallen asleep.

In the morning, his papa was still in bed with Francis laying at his side. Francis placed his hand on his father's cheek, it was obvious he hadn't shaved in a while.

Francis needed to get up though. He had school that morning, but Jean's arm was sprawled over Francis stomach, and he was afraid to wake him. Most mornings after a long night of drinking, Jean would wake up more irritated than ever, and Francis did not want to be the one to welcome him to the call of the new day.

So he laid there still for another ten minutes before the light seeping through the white blinds roused his father from his sleep.

Francis watched as surprise started mingling with the sleepy expression on his father's face. He looked around the room, and then back down at Francis. The look of surprise slowly melted into horror.

"Oh god, Francis... I didn't... I didn't do anything did I?"

Francis was surprised to hear the concern in his father's low voice. Concern...fear...

Francis shook his head meekly.

"No papa, you came in here and fell asleep. That was all."

"Oh god..." Jean moaned in relief, sitting up. He covered his face in his hands, repeating the words a few more times. "I'm so sorry Francis. I-I'm going to stop. I'm going to stop." He promised, pulling Francis into his arms, hugging him tight.

It had been so long since Francis had been hugged by him like this. He wrapped his arms back around the older Bonnefoy and soaked it all in.

"It's okay, papa. I love you."

At recess, Arthur sat off alone as he always did. He had always though that no one seemed to notice. IT was lonely, but Arthur didn't mind. He was more than fine with it.

He had been wrong though. A few people had noticed. The first was Gilbert Belwhatever.

"Hey loser! You hones play with your stupid bugs, and stupid imaginary creatures again!"

Arthur lifted his head. Gilbert was staring at him, a grin in place, and his arms crossed proudly over his chest.

"Yeah! I'm talking to you, eyebrow boy! You're such a loser! Playing all by yourself with the mud and dirt." Gilbert yelled. He then threw his head back, and laughed.

Arthur tried to put on a face of not being bothered, looking back down into the grass. He knew he was better off alone! He didn't need anyone.

"That's not very nice Gilbert."

Arthur jerked is head back up to pinpoint the owner of those words.

"If you keep being mean to everyone, no one will play with you." It was Antonio who said. Arthur made eye contact with him as Antonio gently pushed past Gilbert towards where Arthur was crouched down.

"Hi Arthur! Do you want to play soccer with us? You can play on our team."

"What? No he can't!" Gilbert screamed, frustrated and red, but Antonio ignored him, extending his hand out towards Arthur.

"I promise it'll be fun."

Arthur eyes glued to Antonio's hand.

"I suck."

"That's okay." Antonio smiled. "Gilbert isn't good either, but he still tries to be captain!"

A few seconds past of Arthur simply looking at his hand. He made no movement to get up. Antonio sighed loudly, and shook his hand.

"Arthur, por favor. My arm is getting tired. I'd really like you to play with me."

Arthur's gaze moved from the hand outstretched in front of his face to Antonio's eyes. Antonio did it again. Arthur sighed, taking Antonio's hand and let him help him up.

"Oh why the hell not..."

Antonio laughed, it was light and carefree. He smiled at Arthur, and Arthur made an extra effort to force a crooked smile back. Their hands were joined only a few seconds longer, but it left Arthur's feeling warm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Lot's of things have been going on, so I've been really busy.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Homework and Swimming. How could anything go wrong?

It was a quarter past four, and all Lovino could do was stare anxiously at the big grandfather clock. It less than fifteen minutes, Antonio, Arthur, and Francis would all be in his house to work on projects and then hang out around his pool. Julius, as surprising as it was to Lovino was helping him set up in the living room with everything the boys might need. They had a computer, paper, pencils, glue sticks, scissors, and a couple of poster boards. If they need anything printed, all they had to do was ask, and Julius would get the printer all ready.

Besides for setting up the living room, he set out all kinds of snacks on the island counter in the kitchen. There was Capri Suns, sodas, and mini bottle of waters in the fridge. Pizza was already ordered, and all Julius had to do was go pick it up.

But Lovino was still nervous. Something would happen. Feliciano would step in and everyone would pay attention to him, and would want to hang out with him. Then they'd never get the project done, and they'd all hate him. It was inevitable. He loved Feliciano, but he liked it better when he was the only one there to love him. Not for everyone to ignore 'stupid' Lovino, and declare they liked Feliciano best.

It was making him feel miserable, sitting there on the couch and watching the time tick, tick, tick closer to 4:30. If only Feliciano would stay in his room, then he'd only have to make sure he didn't look stupid all on his own.

4:28

The doorbell rang.

Lovino froze in place. He heard Julius' heavy footsteps walk down the hallway towards the front door, and every step made him cringe.

"Antonio! Good to see you!"

Romano let out a small sigh. It was just Antonio so far.

Antonio was escorted into the living room. He rushed over and hugged Lovino who whined, but hugged him back anyways.

"I'm so excited! I haven't got to swim in your new pool yet!" Antonio exclaimed.

"It's not that cool." Lovino shrugged.

Antonio stuck out his tongue.

"That's because you can swim in it everyday if you want!"

"No, it's because back in Italy, nonno took us to swim in the sea." Lovino said with a little huff.

The doorbell run again, and Antonio jumped in excitement.

"Lovi! Lovi! This is going to be so much fun!" He squealed. "I'll answer it!" Antonio ran over to the door, throwing it open. "Arthur!"

Arthur stood in the doorway with a shaggy red-haired boy who looked just a little older than him. The boy grinned and shoved Arthur forward.

"Mum made me make sure he got here 'safely'. Take care of my scab for me."

Arthur rolled his eyes. He wanted to kill Alistair and then yell at his mom for making him go with him. Antonio pulled Arthur inside quickly, holding his arm. He was basically shaking with excitement like a puppy.

"Si. Si! Of course!" Antonio hugged Arthur tight as he closed the door. "Was that your brother, Arthur?"

"Unfortunately."

Antonio laughed. He never understood when people complained about brothers or sisters. He'd have over ten if it was up to him. Thankfully, he at least had Francis, who in his opinion was the best brother or sister anyone could have.

"Lovino is waiting for us in the living room! We're just waiting for Francis now, but me and you can get started." Antonio chirped, taking the lead down the hallway until it opened into a big space with stylish furniture, waxed floors covered in beautiful rugs, and a huge TV. Antonio had seen it all before, but even the first time he wasn't really impressed. While he liked pretty things, he didn't care about material things. Arthur on the other hand had been just as stunned as Francis. Everything was so shiny and big! He could never imagine living in a place like this.

Lovino was sitting on one of the rugs looking up at them with a little hint of disappointment. Francis was taking forever.

"You guys can sit down over here." Lovino said.

Julius walked into the living room through a small door from the kitchen.

"I also have lots of snacks! You boys make yourself feel at home, alright?"

Arthur and Antonio both nodded as they sat down next to Lovino. The rug was really soft and plush.

Lovino looked around awkwardly. He felt awkward. Even there with Antonio, his own cousin, he felt like he couldn't think straight and get words to come out.

"So are you guys almost done?" He asked, a nervous stammer in his words. Before either could answer, there was another knock on the door, that made Lovino stand up far too quickly.

"I'll get it." Lovino called. Antonio giggled. As Lovino walked to the door, greatly slowing his pace, he burned red with embarrassment. He'd been a little too excited to let in who he thought was on the other side of the door. There was another knock and then Lovino heard someone in a deeper voice talk in a scolding manner.

Pressing himself against the door, Lovino stood on his toes to see into the peephole. He had on the same pink shirt with the ruffles on the edges and khaki shorts as he did earlier, but now his hair was up into ponytails. The man next to him, holding him by the arm, Lovino guessed to be his father. He was saying something about Francis' knocking, his face very close to Francis' ear. Lovino couldn't be exactly sure of what was being said, so he went ahead and opened the door. Francis' father straightened up, and slid his hand down into Francis', but Francis pulled away to give Lovino a big hug.

Lovino blushed, more of that pesky embarrassment swirling into his stomach.

"D-Dammit Francis. I just saw you at school!"

He didn't tell him to stop though, curling one arm around him. Glancing over Francis' shoulder he noticed the father watching them with a look of...disgust? Or something else.

Lovino felt the presence of his grandfather behind him, and the look on the father's face dissolved. The two adults started talking, and Lovino and Francis went inside to join Antonio and Arthur.

They all got pretty far in their projects. After getting to a good stopping point, Julius had them change and let them out back to the pool.

Francis was thrilled. He let down his ponytails and jumped into the deep end without any hesitation, letting out a giddy scream of excitement. Lovino who had decided to keep his shirt on with his trunks, snorted as Francis swam back up for air. His hair made him look like a wet mop head.

Arthur stayed back the lounge chairs. This was all head had been dreading since he got there. He didn't know how to swim, and bad things had happened before when he got near water. He was shaking, but he didn't realize it until Antonio put a hand on his bare, freckled shoulder.

"Do you want to jump in with me?" Antonio asked.

Arthur shook his head, watching quietly as Francis tugged Lovino, who had been innocently sitting at the edge of the pool into the cool water.

"I'm just going to watch." Arthur replied.

"That's not any fun, Eyebrows!" Francis exclaimed, giggling as Lovino attempted to duck him under in revenge.

"We can jump in together." Antonio then added, taking Arthur's hand.

Arthur knew that it still wasn't a good idea, but Antonio did that thing once again with his eyes and the little push of his lips. The water couldn't be that deep. He'd make it alright.

Together, Arthur and Antonio walked along the side of the pool until Antonio could choose a perfect spot to jump from.

"Are you ready?" Antonio grinned.

Arthur looked out to the water, paling.

"I think so."

"On three, we jump holding hands. One."

Arthur was going to die.

"Two." Arthur was going to drown and die.

"Three."

The boys sprinted and then took off jumping at the edge of the pool. The water exploded into a big splash as they hit the surface, sending streams and droplets everywhere.

Arthur was okay for a few seconds, the cool water rushing around him It gave him enough time to think, 'I'm still alive.'

He started trying to tear through the water, get himself back up to the top, but his body just didn't know how to find it's way back up. He started panicking when his feet hit the bottom. He tried jumping up from the bottom, flailing his arms in a way he thought was most like the swimmers he had seen on the Olympics. He was going to die. That's all there was. But then his fingers brushed against skin. Antonio. He grabbed for him, not sure what part he grabbing, and pulled himself up on Antonio.

Antonio realized what was going on as soon as he felt Arthur's nails scratch at his skin as he grabbed for him. He wrapped his hand around Arthur's arm, and pulled him up.

Arthur gasped when he finally resurfaced, choking and coughing up water. His heart was beating fast. For a second, he thought it was going to burst right there with his lungs.

Still holding onto Arthur, Antonio swam over to the edge of the pool, helping him grab onto the side.

"What happened?" Francis and Lovino swam over.

"I don't know!" Antonio said in scared, worried tone. Gently, he patted Arthur's back as he kept panting and coughing up water. "Arthur, are you okay? Lovino, go get abuelo Julius!"

There was no argument from Lovino. He pulled himself out of the water, and stood up. But Arthur grabbed him by the ankle first.

"I'm okay." He said hoarsely, shaking his head.

Hesitating, Lovino slowly knelt back down on the edge with his hands on his knees.

"What happened then, idiot? Antonio almost had a heart attack right there!"

"I can't swim okay!" Arthur said, closing his eyes.

Francis groaned, pushing himself up on the other side of Lovino. He sat there, letting his feet dangle in the water, leaving on Antonio and Arthur still in the pool.

"Then why didn't you tell us?" Francis said rather harshly, though the harshness came mostly because he had actually been worried as well.

"I don't know!" Arthur snapped. His throat burned, everything hurt still. "I guess...I-I guess I was embarrassed."

"Well now you're even more embarrassed aren't you!" Lovino said, standing back up. With his hands on his hips, drops of water ran down his arm and dropped off his elbow onto Francis. He was irritated. What if he had died right there, all because he was too embarrassed!

"Leave him alone." Antonio said, there was a sharpness towards Lovino and Francis that was unusual for Antonio. "Come on, Arthur." He said, his voice soft again. "Let's sit down, okay?" Antonio got out of the pool, and then helped Arthur out. He rested his arm around Arthur, walking him over to the lounge chairs.

Francis shrugged, slipping back into the pool, Lovino following suit. There wasn't much playing to be done at first, but after a few minutes and a few glances Arthur's way to make sure he was okay, they were splashing and throwing pool toys at each other.

Back on the chairs, Antonio was rubbing Arthur's back, trying to keep him comforted.

"I hate water." Arthur mumbled. The burn in his nose and throat had subsided, so the only burning was from the sun slowly roasting his pale skin. "I think I'm cursed to have bad things happened when I'm in the water." Arthur waited for Antonio to laugh or roll his eyes, but that didn't happen. He simply nodded, crossing his legs into the chair, listening intently.

"Why do you think that, Arthur?" He asked softly. He was watching Arthur so closely, it made Arthur's cheeks hot. He wasn't used to the attention.

"My sister drowned in a river. She was Liam's twin." He whispered, "I was too small and I couldn't swim so..." Arthur stared down into his lap. His face was wet, but he couldn't tell if that the taste of chlorine or salt on his lips.

"I couldn't swim, so I watched it carry her away. A-And when Owen go there, it was too late." He said quietly. The trembling in his body had returned. He hated the water. He hated thinking about the mess of red curls being dragged down stream, farther and farther from his reach as he cried and screamed for Alistair, Owen, Mum, Daddy or someone!

Usually he was alone when he woke up from these nightmares, do when he felt Antonio's head on his shoulder, the images slowly melted.

"I'm sorry." Antonio whispered, meaning it. It reminded of how helpless he felt when his mother's sickness got really bad.

"Me too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Sorry it's taken so long. So many things I'm dealing with right now.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The story is actually further along on my FF.net account. Oops. If you want to catch up there feel free to comment with a link!

There eventually came a time, when Antonio would remember that evening in the pool, and all the talks with Arthur about his sister would come back into mind. They were all around the age of twelve now, no longer little boys in Elementary school, but in middle school now. The four of them had become so much closer, best friends, even. And if you saw one, you knew at least another was nearby.

During the autumn break, Francis and Antonio had started dating. Soon after childish dates at the movies and arcades, winter came with a jolting curve. It was a colder than usual night in December when Antonio got news that his mother's cancer had returned. It was so sudden, a shock to his mother and father, and it had come back even more aggressive.

Antonio was afraid that he was going to lose his mother this time. Last time, he had been so young that he didn't understand the words he had heard his parents whisper when they thought he had gone to bed. But now he was a little older, and the fake smiles of confidence didn't blow over as easy this time. He was afraid to even talk about it. To say anything to any of his friends, even to Francis who he trusted everything with.

But while he kept quiet, the rest of them had noticed the change in Antonio. Francis noticed first, and he was the first to bring it up one afternoon after school. He made Antonio walk with him to the ice-cream parlor down the street as a 'romantic' date. His treat.

Francis knew Antonio better than anyone else. He knew that Antonio wouldn't come right out and say what was wrong. He would try to pretend that everything was okay for as long as he could. But there were always signs Francis could read. His smile was tighter, when he smiled that was. The way he curled his fingers around Francis' when Francis reached to take his hand. It was rather too tight as if he was trying to hold on to something and was about to lose it, or it was too loose. That was when Antonio was no longer in the same world as Francis' anymore.

That afternoon when Francis took Antonio's hand, Antonio was staring off at nothing, his fingers didn't tighten around Francis' hand at all. It was as if Francis wasn't even there at all, like a toddler tooting around with a teddy bear that could never hold their hand in return.

"Where are you?" Francis asked, leaning against Antonio. His shoulder's were a little sore after a long, very loud talk with his father the night before, but it only felt right with their shoulders touching.

Antonio seemed to finally realize that he had wandered out of the realm of consciousness, and looked up at Francis, pushing out his famous smile.

"What do you mean?" He laughed. "I'm right here!" For emphasis, he squeezed Francis' hand and leaned over to kiss his cheek. They hadn't kissed on the lips yet.

"But it's like your in your own dream somewhere. You haven't said anything to me since we left school." Francis said softly.

Antonio shrugged. "I haven't been having good dreams at night, Francis. Maybe I just want to dream now, when I can think of good things. Like all the ice-cream we're going to eat! Oh Francis! I heard they're coming out with a new special flavor for Christmas! Just like the pumpkin one for fall. It's peppermint or something like that! Maybe they'll have it today."

Francis sighed, rolling his eyes. "You weren't thinking of ice-cream! I'm not stupid, Antonio." His voice softened a little. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong."

"You're lying." Francis said, the softness slowly leaving his voice, but it was still so heavy with concern. Because that was the reason for this. He was worried about Antonio. "You better tell me, right now. We're boyfriend's remember. We're supposed to tell each other everything, and go on dates, and kiss and hug. But you haven't done anything like that lately! You won't even hang out. A-And when you do, you don't smile unless someone looks at you. But I see you when you don't think anyone's looking. And you don't smile anymore. Not like usually, and you're not like that, Antonio. You always smile."

Antonio stared at Francis, his eyes wide. Francis had started shaking by now, and he was squeezing Antonio's hand so tight it was starting to hurt. Antonio wanted to tell Francis what was going on. He really did, but if he said it, it would make it even more real. And if he told Francis he was afraid his mother was going to die, then she would. So he had to keep lying, and keep pretending.

"I'm just tired, Francis. But I'm still me. I still smile! I don't know what you're talking about." Antonio said softly. He leaned forward, and gently kissed Francis' cheek. "I'm going to buy the ice-cream, okay?"

The next person to realize what was going on was Lovino, but he had an advantage. Antonio was family. So as family, he had been invited over for a small meal a few weeks after Antonio had learned of the returning illness.

Honestly, Lovino didn't want to be there. Ever since Antonio and Francis had started dating, he had an underlying anger towards his cousin. He couldn't explain it, but he had started crushing on Francis. And he thought Francis liked him too. Then he asked Antonio out, and he realized that he still wasn't good enough.

It was worse when he was around the two of them together, so he was at least relieved that this was a family only gathering, and that Francis had not been invited.

At dinner, Lovino noticed that something was off with everyone besides for Feliciano who was his usual bubbly, obnoxious self. Once everyone had eaten, Julius sent the boys to do dishes while he talked with Antonio's parents.

They didn't talk much while they washed. Antonio scrubbed the dishes, Feliciano rinsed, and then Lovino dried them and put them away. The only one who really talked was Feliciano. Antonio would only quietly answer his questions. Lovino thought it was weird, but he didn't think too much into it.

"Hey, I'm going to go to the bathroom. Just pile the dishes up on the counter for me, Feli." Lovino said, drying his hands on his jeans.

"Okay Lovi!"

Lovino rolled his eyes, turning out of the kitchen. He walked by the living room door where the adults were talking, not really paying any mind to what was being said until something Julius said caught his attention.

"It came back even stronger, Julius. That's what we're saying. We haven't told Antonio yet, but the doctor said he doesn't think Isabel has even a whole year to live."

Lovino gasped, covering his mouth over his hand. He ran down the hall and shut himself in the bathroom. He couldn't believe what he had heard. He wasn't even sure if he had heard right. Was Isabel dying?

Now it made sense why Antonio had been acting weird the past few weeks. He had even been off with Francis, and secretly Lovino had hoped it meant that the two would break up. Now that he knew the truth, he felt horrible. He had been hoping that Francis would wake up and tell Antonio off, when the truth was that Antonio was going through what he had gone through so long ago.

It made Lovino feel like a terrible person, and all the hate he had been keeping under a lid for dinner rose up in his throat. He was so stupid. No wonder Francis liked Antonio better. He looked up into the mirror, trying to calm down. He didn't want to do this at Antonio's house. Red blotches were coming up on his cheeks. His chubby cheeks. They didn't go away like everyone else's did. He hated them too. Just like everything else about himself.

There was a knock on the door. Lovino jumped. It made him have to stop pinning down everything he hated about himself, and all the things that made him a bad person.

"Someone's in here!" He stuttered, quickly unbuttoning his pants. He still had to pee.

"Are you almost done?" It was Antonio. "I have to pee too!"

Lovino ignored him long enough to do his business.

"Almost. Give me a second!" Lovino shook himself, letting the last driblets fall into the toilet, and then stuffed everything back into his pants. "I'm coming out!" He turned on the sink, and scrubbed his hands as fast as he could. He took one last glance at himself in the mirror. The red spots were already going away thankfully. He finally opened the door, letting out a sigh as he stood face to face with Antonio. After hearing about his mom, now he realized while Antonio hadn't been smiling as often.

Lovino moved aside to let Antonio through, but then he stopped him at the same time, his hand on Antonio's arm.

"Hey...are you okay, Antonio? You don't seem like yourself. A-And I know I'm big jerk most of the times, b-but you can talk to me. I know what it's like."

Something passed in Antonio's eyes, and he visibly paled. But it only lasted for a second. "I'm fine, Lovino! You and Francis are so silly. You guys act like something's wrong, but I promise, everything's okay! I really, really have to pee though!"

Lovino wanted to say something else, to let him know that he knew what was going on with his mom, but Antonio said Francis' name. Of course Francis would have already noticed something was wrong with him. Lovino snorted, letting go of Antonio. If Antonio didn't want to talk, why should he push it? If he needed someone, he would talk, and if anything he had Francis anyways. He didn't need Lovino.

"Yeah, obviously everything is peachy isn't it." Lovino mumbled walking away.

That one almost broke Antonio. He almost turned around, ready to spill everything. But Lovino was a fast walker, and Antonio really did have to pee.

It wasn't until Arthur had begged him to go the mall with him. That Antonio finally let everything out. Arthur needed someone to go with him to pick buy a new Doctor Who shirt he had seen online that he really wanted. He didn't want to go alone, but Francis would make fun of his DW obsession, and Lovino would talk about how stupid it was the whole time. His only option was Antonio. His mom had made Alistair offer to give them a ride, but he knew better than to accept, especially knowing that Alistair had a cute date that day.

That meant that he and Antonio had to ride their bikes there. It was cold, but it wasn't too bad. They each had on sweaters to keep them warm. The ride back was just as easy. Arthur was excited, and had started talking about everything that had been happening in the latest season. Halfway home, they took a break at one of their favorite parks. It had small pond to the back where they usually sat under a large shade tree.

"You haven't talked at all today, Antonio. That's really fucking weird, you realize." Arthur acknowledged, yanking dead grass that had died in the last frost.

Antonio laughed, "I'm just tired."

"You've been saying that."

There was a low rustling from the breeze carrying off leaves that had resisted from falling until now. Antonio could hear it. He could also hear the soft buzzing from bugs that stayed through the winter, and he could feel bumps rise up the back of his neck the only unprotected part of his body from the wind. He could hear his mother's voice in his head, 'You should have worn that nice scarf papa and I got for you, bambino.'

"You're crying."

Antonio lifted his head, looking over at Arthur.

"What?"

"I...well... you look like you're crying."

Flushing, Antonio started wiping furiously at his face, squeezing his eyes shut.

"I'm okay! I'm fine." He whimpered. "I just don't want her to leave me." Antonio burst into tears, throwing his arms around Arthur's shoulder. "I don't want her to die. I need her." He sobbed.

Arthur was confused, but he hugged Antonio back. It was awkward from his side, not being someone who thrusted himself into outwards affection, but he didn't dare try to pull away from Antonio. He had never seen him this upset before.

"You don't want who to leave? What's going on?" Arthur tried to keep his voice gentle and soft, just as Antonio would have done and had done so many times for him.

"Mama's cancer came back. And it's worse. It's so much worse this time, Arthur. They don't think I know, but I heard them talking I bed the other night. She's going to die." Antonio cried, burying his face into Arthur's warm neck. All he could think about was how she was going to leave him. And he knew that he'd still have papa, he'd still have his abuelo, he'd have Lovino, Francis, Arthur, and Estrella. He'd still have everyone else there, but they didn't matter at all in the end. His mama was the one who was always there for him, his sweet, beautiful mama. She was the one who made him soup when he was sick. She kissed him goodnight, and made him believe that all his dreams would come true. But if she died, then it all would be a lie. She'd be gone, his first dream would have crashed, and all the rest would follow through.

"Antonio, it'll be okay." Arthur whispered softly, rubbing his back. That was a lie though. He knew it was a lie. He had seen his sister die, and he knew it wasn't okay. Not at first.

"It'll be okay eventually. Your mum is still here. Don't think about what could happen. You...You should keep loving her, and be happy that she's here now. Don't...Don't you think?"

"I don't know how." Antonio mumbled into Arthur's now damp shoulder. "All I can think about is her leaving me."

"Then that's your fault, Antonio." Arthur said sharply. "You're the one who chooses what you're going to do. Go do something fun with her. Make dinner for her and watch a movie in bed. I don't know either. Only you can do it. Or you can be miserable, but I'm telling you that being sad like this sucks."

Antonio pulled back, wiping his nose and eyes again.

"Okay?"

"Okay." Antonio whimpered, slowly nodding his head.

The temperature started to drop as the sun began it's early descent. It wasn't until then that Arthur stood up with Antonio, and together rode their bikes back home.

As soon as Antonio walk into his house, he ran for his parents room and jumped into his mother's arms, waking her from her sleep. He hugged her tightly, a small smile on his face. She smelled like cocoa and cinnamon, a smell that always filled the house during the winter, and would always be reminder of his sweet mama and home.

"Te amo mucho, mama." He mumbled.

At the Kirkland's residence, Arthur stumbled inside, the smell of food being cooked in the kitchen drifting into his nose. He looked around, sliding his fingers over the walls as he made his way to the origin of the smell. Alice Kirkland was hunched over the stove, her glasses from work still perched on her nose, and her thick, long hair in messy bun. Despite having been at work all day, she was still there making dinner. Usually it would have been their, father's Harry job on Friday's, but he had been asked to stay late at his job and dinner was left to Alice.

And she did it with a tired smile on her face because she loved her family. She did everything so that her boys could have the best life that she was capable to give. Arthur forget that sometimes. With all his other siblings, he ended up usually feeling left out. But watching her there, stirring slowly whatever might be in her pot, grew a whole new appreciation for her. He came up behind her, and tightly wrapped his arms around her waist.

She jumped, looking down at him.

"Arthur, love? Are you okay?" She asked softly, gently running her fingers through his hair.

Arthur lifted his head to look up at her and nodded.

"I just really love you." He blushed, and then quickly hid his face in her sweater, hugging her harder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also I'm sorry for the slow updates!!! Thank you so much for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> This is my brand new work! It's going to follow Francis, Antonio, Lovino and Arthur all the way up to college. I really hope you like it!


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